Learned helplessness

You’d eventually learn
That it is a long, long time
To await for day break

You’d understand
Your consciousness is futile
As it is paralysing

Cruising the edge of
Insanity, blurring lines of
Dream and reality

The rhythm of blood
Pumping at your ears, mocking
The count down of eternity

You’d eventually believe
Trapped in a forever present
Like a dream you cannot awake — an irony

In this dream,
You are alone.
And alone, you will always be.

(writteninstead)

Sunflower

I only wanted to be free
Live against the gravity
Infinite, the colour white — I am sunlight!

But if I am light
I cannot love the shadows
How can I fly? With half body heavy in soil

Each of them
Formed a vein and spread like roots
I am no sunlight, I am only a sunflower

(writteninstead)

Act of pain

Pain is a strange thing
Full of lies, it will be
Painting stories of tragedy
you will learn to believe

Into the role, perfectly
Pushing at you, screaming
Crying. A disgusting mess of
Madness and grief

Sorry I let the poison of pain
Swallow me; I forgot to see
Every time I clawed at you,
You’ve only responded with love

(writteninstead)

Loving you was easiest / it was only hard 'cause I loved you so

But baby, it’s so dark
Regardless day or night

Now I am in the waters
Regardless land or sea

And baby, you know I cannot swim!
I cannot breathe
I….

But baby, do not get me wrong
Loving you was the easiest

It was only hard
Because I loved you so

(writteninstead)

Protect you

I watch you sleep
And hold your hands
Kiss your moan
And cease your frown

I watch you sleep
And know that I can
not protect you
From yourself

I watch you sleep
And really wish I can
“I love you”
I can only hold your hands

(writteninstead)

The Moon

I am sorry

I am morning dew this
second; lava in the next
Drown you in love now
can’t look at you after
Too little
too much
Never in between

Please

know that I am stuck
in a dream. My reality
crumbles
reconstructs
Know that my love is
never gone; only at times
disguised,
tucked beneath the ugly

(writteninstead)

With a broken soul, i will protect the whole of you

If knowing will hurt you,
I’ll never have you find
The truth about my broken soul

I’ll have my cuts under sleeves
And tears flowing inwards
I will protect the whole of you

(writteninstead)